is a long poo a good poo?

[fireproof]

I had to bring this one to the new forums as well, we cant let such a long runnign toilet thread die out.....

[Kelly]

It's actually already been brought back....just under a new name.....I'll leave it up to you to find it ;)

[fireproof]

see i didnt like it under the name chris put it, it doesnt directly refer to the subject matter.......

[Kelly]

That's the fun of it :p

[themadclipper]

Well, it IS #2, so I think there's enough material to have two ....

[fireproof]

Well, it IS #2, so I think there's enough material to have two ....

poo-right there is enough to fill two!

[themadclipper]

Is a long poo a good poo?
20. Mar 2005 at 22:24
I was talking with a friend of mine a few weeks ago and we got on the subject of taking a poo. I believe I was the one who brought it up.

Me: "What do you think, is a long poo a good poo?"
My Friend: "Would you care to be more specific?"
Me: "Well, it's a time to think things through and just 'let it out' if you know what I mean. Ha, double meaning, it's great!"
My Friend: "HA! That's awesome. Yeah man, I'd have to agree. A long poo is definately a good poo, all the way!"
Me: "Depends on what you're thinking about too I guess... Nothing more depressing than thinking about 'crap' as it were while you're sitting on the toilet... haha."
My Friend: "Well... If you look at it that way... I guess so..."

So, I want to know your guys' opinions; Is a long poo a good poo? Any comments? Cheesy lol *awaits the very weird responses*
Back to top

[Labby]

And thus sparked over seventy pages of madness...

[themadclipper]

I have to say it...

Its still going.

[fireproof]

I learned a few things today, one of which was not to stand by the coast on an island that has loads of sea gulls flying around. Needless to say i had to pour a bottle of water over my neck and had to tolerate small stains on the back of my tshirt for tyhe journey back to a friends flat (where my car with my spare tshirt was) which was an apporx 2hr journey on bus ferry and car.

Bleedin rats on wings!

[themadclipper]

LOL!

That's ... too ... funny!

[fireproof]

see the logic in havign the tshirt back at the flat was less wight in the backpack and i knew id wnat to change before chilling out at said flat, i did not anticipate problems with flying rodents

[themadclipper]

I'm not crazy about bats- they really are rodents with wings (and radar!)

[fireproof]

Bats are endangered here which means we cant shoot the lilttle sods hahah

Kidding.

Sea gulls and pidgeons are the worst. Pure evil.

[krazyyouth]

yeah we have lots of bats flying around an oak tree i thought were talking and sometimes it can be scary :-0

[themadclipper]

Bat scat is still scat.

Scat, bat!

(A pseudo-Seuss?)

[Jesuskid]

Fireproof get a life and stop talking about poo!

[Labby]

Euan, our resident ignorant foreigner, has a life. And scatology is one of the few things that is the same everywhere. We all do it, so why not talk about it?

My friends just got back from a camping trip last night. They're getting married in August; it was the groom's family's annual camping trip. And it was her first time camping.

So today she was telling me about it, and how it's truly roughing it: there's no electricity, no cell service, no cabins, no showers whatsoever. All they had were outhouses.

I then told her that they weren't really roughing it, because of the outhouses. If they were really roughing it, all they'd have had was a bucket and a shovel.

To which her fiance responded, "Who needs the bucket?"

And he also objected to my mention of bringing toilet paper. I mean, I know one can use leaves, but with my luck, I'd grab some poison oak (which really does not sound appealing).

[fireproof]

Euan, our resident ignorant foreigner, has a life. And scatology is one of the few things that is the same everywhere. We all do it, so why not talk about it?

My friends just got back from a camping trip last night. They're getting married in August; it was the groom's family's annual camping trip. And it was her first time camping.

So today she was telling me about it, and how it's truly roughing it: there's no electricity, no cell service, no cabins, no showers whatsoever. All they had were outhouses.

I then told her that they weren't really roughing it, because of the outhouses. If they were really roughing it, all they'd have had was a bucket and a shovel.

To which her fiance responded, "Who needs the bucket?"

And he also objected to my mention of bringing toilet paper. I mean, I know one can use leaves, but with my luck, I'd grab some poison oak (which really does not sound appealing).

hahaha yes indeed. I know a texan called HR (his name actually is HR, it doesn stand for anything) and one year on a camping weekend that had showers available, he refused to use them, as it wasnt prop[er camping if you washed in showers, thankfully he was in a diff tent compartment from me. Though he was persuaded to run into the sea to clean up a bit!

[Labby]

See, using the river/lake/stream/ocean to bathe is okay. That's manly. Just make sure you do it upstream of where you take a leak.

[fireproof]

See, using the river/lake/stream/ocean to bathe is okay. That's manly. Just make sure you do it upstream of where you take a leak.

well he is from texas.......

[LauraA]

http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb189/Raptureready49/untitled-3.jpg

[Wheels4Jesus]

LOL, Laura you are a riot!! Where did you ever find that comic?

[JC#1Nashvillefan]

that's funny

[fireproof]

aaaaah i loove that. Its on a birthday card over here, theres a series of them.

[CaraBear]

out of all the trheads to crossover...it had to be the poo thread....lol

[Labby]

out of all the trheads to crossover...it had to be the poo thread....lol

There have been a number of them. I do believe the topic regarding my follicles also crossed over.

Oh, and this is the second thread about fecal matter on this board.

[fireproof]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsVgi8hoFFc

enough said.

[The Dude2200]

i sat on a mouse trap. hurt real good. i didn't know i could still scream like a girl

[fireproof]

i sat on a mouse trap. hurt real good. i didn't know i could still scream like a girl

what does this have to do with poo lol?

[LauraA]

i sat on a mouse trap. hurt real good. i didn't know i could still scream like a girl

what does this have to do with poo lol?

I don't know why, but that really cracked me up. Dan asked why I was laughing and I told him. He asked where (what thread) I was and I told him "The Poo Thread". He goes, "That's really gross. It sounds like rope burn...." More laughing.

My dad sent me that comic via email. Must have received it in a card or email. I thought it was pretty funny.

[Labby]

what does this have to do with poo lol?

Perhaps someone put a mousetrap on the toilet seat?

*pauses until the full realization of what that means hits him*

OWWWW!!!!

[fireproof]

hahaha nice work steve, only you can cause your own discomfort with what you say!

[The Dude2200]

well i figured it would be okay to post that on here cuz you know, i sat on it with my BUTT and poo comes from--- oh well you know where i'm going with thatt. haha (:

[fireproof]

well i figured it would be okay to post that on here cuz you know, i sat on it with my BUTT and poo comes from--- oh well you know where i'm going with thatt. haha (:

yes butts are ok for theis thread but defication is the primary function.

[themadclipper]

This is no big revelation, but have you ever notice that when a duker straddles the hole in the commode, it just plain don't want to go down?

The bigger question, though, is this: how does it get into this unnatural position?

[fireproof]

the element of chance cannot be ruled out, hoever heres a potential theory.

As dukies come out in a sausage esque manner, it could be that the outer end is heavier and more compact than the inner end as it is coming out of the rectum, this causes a miss balance when the inner end is finally realeased from the hole and hence causing the poo to rotate in that direction, the distance between rectum and toilety is only so much that it gets half a rotation and hence forth ends up in the straddled position.

[Labby]

A very interesting theory, indeed.

Man, my gastro-intestinal tract has been very unhappy lately, forcing me to make several more trips to the commode than I would wish.

[Toddrick33]

I can't believe I've missed this thread for so long! Too bad we didn't save the old thread!

My family visited me here this weekend, and there must've been some good poos goin' on because the toilet seat broke!

[djbos]

Haha...I thought I was clicking on the last thing you ate thread and clicked on this one on accident....little bit of a difference there....complete opposite ends of the spectrum. :p

[fireproof]

I can't believe I've missed this thread for so long! Too bad we didn't save the old thread!

My family visited me here this weekend, and there must've been some good poos goin' on because the toilet seat broke!

Thats more of a leg weakness problem i think, instead of gently lowering ones rectum into position, one just lets it collapse onto the seat, henceforth the potential breakage scenario!

[Toddrick33]

Thats more of a leg weakness problem i think, instead of gently lowering ones rectum into position, one just lets it collapse onto the seat, henceforth the potential breakage scenario!

Ah, but if you slowly lower yourself onto the throne, it's not as good. There's something satisfying to plop down before you plop!

[fireproof]

Ah, but if you slowly lower yourself onto the throne, it's not as good. There's something satisfying to plop down before you plop!

If your budget allows you to cover the cost of replacement toilet seats then you are allowed the luxury of as you say plopping before you plop.

[Toddrick33]

Well since my mother broke it, she bought it! ;)

[fireproof]

Well since my mother broke it, she bought it! ;)

hmm that in itself is a contentious point. Just because it was your mothers landing that ultimately brough that particular seat to an end, it may not have been her fault as the the reason for the breakage. For all we know it could have been your fault Todd, for your blatent disrespect of the toilet seat laws of preservation.

[Toddrick33]

I actually blame the previous renters. But who am I to question my mum's (that's for you) willingness to compensate a broke chap? :)

[fireproof]

I actually blame the previous renters. But who am I to question my mum's (that's for you) willingness to compensate a broke chap? :)

Well if your conscious allows you to do such a thingg then so be it!

JUst saw this birthday card with a picture of a poo(not rea) and two flies hoevring above it, one with a pint of beer asking 'is this stool taken?'
love it!

[Labby]

Euan, that's pretty funny.

I watched the movie Assassins (with Sly Stallone and Antonia Banderas) this morning, and there was a story told that I think is very appropriate for this thread:

A sparrow was flying south for the winter, but on the way he flew too high and froze solid. He plummeted to the earth, landing in a field. Then a cow came along and crapped on him.

The crap was nice and warm, and melted the ice. The little sparrow, now finding himself very warm, started singing for joy. A cat overheard it and came by. The cat cleaned the crap off this little sparrow and ate him.

You see, not everyone who puts you through crap is your enemy. And not everyone who gets you out of crap is your friend. And wherever you find yourself, if you're warm and happy, then keep your big mouth shut.

[Toddrick33]

Nice... to both of the preceding replies!

[Toddrick33]

Oh my word... This has got to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen!

Does anybody watch Scrubs? That show is hilarious!
Anyway, I watched an episode tonight where there is a lady with an aneurism in her brain that causes her to see stuff in music. So the show was a musical. Well they were going to check her pool sample, so there is a song called "Everything Comes Down to Poo."

I HAD to check YouTube, and it's there!

I listened to it real quick again, there was no profanity in it, so enjoy! It's fantastic!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsVgi8hoFFc

[fireproof]

Oh my word... This has got to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen!

Does anybody watch Scrubs? That show is hilarious!
Anyway, I watched an episode tonight where there is a lady with an aneurism in her brain that causes her to see stuff in music. So the show was a musical. Well they were going to check her pool sample, so there is a song called "Everything Comes Down to Poo."

I HAD to check YouTube, and it's there!

I listened to it real quick again, there was no profanity in it, so enjoy! It's fantastic!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsVgi8hoFFc

if you were paying attention mr law student ud have npticed i posted that several posts ago,.

Two or three of us often burst out into singing that randomly
Pure unadulterated genius

and Steve thats awesome haha!

[Toddrick33]

Blast! I didn't read this whole thread, the truth is out! :o

I ventured a guess that 5 pages was insufficient for that to be posted... I thought maybe it was in the old thread... "Guy love" is great, too! :D

Plus in the less than 4 weeks I've been in law school, I've read approximately 400 pages, so I don't feel like backreading if I miss a thread! ;)

[fireproof]

You are forgiven!
I do love that episode, all the songs are great and they way they mix up different musical composers styles is amazing, i particularly love the les mis style 'truth comes out'

[Toddrick33]

In a recent episode of Scrubs, J.D. passed out when he pooed. :)

[fireproof]

In a recent episode of Scrubs, J.D. passed out when he pooed. :)

I remember that one, genius!

Its not a well know fact to men, that women soil during labour!
Minging!

[Toddrick33]

Ouch, that stinks... hehe ;)

[Labby]

So I finally got around to watching that Scrubs clip.

That's only mildly disturbing.

I found another video on our favorite topic, from the tv show King of the Hill. Hank can't go:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

[themadclipper]

Haha...I thought I was clicking on the last thing you ate thread and clicked on this one on accident....little bit of a difference there....complete opposite ends of the spectrum. :p
True, you're talking spectrum. whilst the topic of the thread is rectum.

[themadclipper]

I remember that one, genius!

Its not a well know fact to men, that women soil during labour!
Minging!

Actually, I think the delivery room crew crew makes every effort to make sure the mother's bowels are as empty as possible, as there is all of this pushing going on, ....

[Toddrick33]

Labby, are you sure that link is correct??

[fireproof]

i mean we all know rick astley is'topic of this thread'but we dont need to see a video of him!

[LauraA]

Never heard of this guy...is he really singing this? His voice doesn't "go" with him. Anyway, I liked the backflip the gal did at 2:27. :D

[Labby]

Todd, you've just been rolled. I can't believe you didn't realize that.

Enjoy your day, and be forever suspicious of any YouTube links I post from now on.

"Never gonna give you up..."

[Toddrick33]

Well when I did a You Tube search for "King of the Hill Hank Poo" and nothing showed up, I thought maybe you were pranking... At least I stopped after watching for only a minute! ;)

And I'm a zombie looking for humor, so don't post unfunny videos! I have hardly time to watch the good ones! :p

[Labby]

Ah, but Rickrolling someone is funny!

[Toddrick33]

Pardon my naïveté, but what's Rickrolling?

[Labby]

Wikipedia.

Or, what I did to you: posted a link to a video that turned out to be "Never Gonna Give You Up."

[Toddrick33]

I would like to point out that you got more than me! :P

[fireproof]

i knew all about rickrolling but i had to play along!

rick astley is a horrible musical creation!

[Toddrick33]

i knew all about rickrolling but i had to play along!

rick astley is a horrible musical creation!

I'll have to admit... I don't believe you that you were playing along! :p

You're the worst thing that's happened to musical theatre since Andrew Lloyd Webber!
(And I won't say what terrible show I used to watch that that's from.)

[fireproof]

I'll have to admit... I don't believe you that you were playing along! :p

You're the worst thing that's happened to musical theatre since Andrew Lloyd Webber!
(And I won't say what terrible show I used to watch that that's from.)

Im british so by default i know about rick astley and rickrolling....

[Toddrick33]

Just to get this on topic, I'm sure that we'll agree that we're talking about crap! :P

[Labby]

There was an XKCD comic about Rickrolling Rick Astley.

I was amused.

[themadclipper]

Rick Astley's "music" is crap, but is not scat.

However, if you want REAL COOL scat, check out http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpHLEm9-0bg
:cool:

[Toddrick33]

To click the link... or not click the link! :confused:

[fireproof]

To click the link... or not click the link! :confused:

todd, its poo, you cant get hamlet into a discussion about poo!!!s

[Toddrick33]

Why not? I'm sure Hamlet had to perform necessary bodily functions! What if he had to go while on stage??:eek:

[Toddrick33]

Essential household item = potpourri spray!

[Labby]

Todd, you're a guy: light a match!

Wait, that actually might not be a good idea. Methane fumes + open flame?

Bye bye, house!

[Toddrick33]

I kind of have this little thing called passing the bar that I have to worry about, and arson will not help with bar admittance! :)

And no, I don't mean that I'm eating a bar and waiting for it to pass!

(Yay, I provoked activity in this thread!)

[CaraBear]

I STILL dont get the poo thread...guess I never will:confused:

[Labby]

That's because you don't have a Y chromosome, Cara.

It's a guy thing. Just leave it at that.

[Toddrick33]

I think maybe the thing that frightens you most, Cara, is that you do get this thread but are afraid to admit it! :D

[CaraBear]

No Todd I really just want to delete the thread....but I know you love it so....so...I refrain.:p

[Labby]

Aw, Cara. Of all the threads one could delete, this is the ONE THREAD you absolutely CAN'T delete. How much history does this thread represent?

[Toddrick33]

You have no idea how I was tempted to delete the entire worthless SIC when I was a mod at the other boards! ;)

(Two can play at this game, sista! Except the fact that I currently have no powers...) :p

[Labby]

Heh; there were a couple threads over there that "accidently" got deleted.

A couple times, it really was an accident!

[CaraBear]

You have no idea how I was tempted to delete the entire worthless SIC when I was a mod at the other boards! ;)

(Two can play at this game, sista! Except the fact that I currently have no powers...) :p

Well since we are "best friends" I will let you keep your poo thread since I currently have button powers muahahahahahaha! Remember the first time we met...you said I was your new best friend....that proclaimation has saved your pooness!!

[Toddrick33]

LOL! I do actually remember that! was that really 3 years ago already!?

[CaraBear]

LOL! I do actually remember that! was that really 3 years ago already!?

Yea...This Month...back when I saw you every month or so...I think it has been close to a year...since we have cross paths.

Ok before I highjack the nasty poo thread maybe I should add a poo related something...... Now that my Jesse has started school he now knows that he is not sopose to go in the girls bathroom, and checks the door, and is simply very distraught when I make him go with me in a public place that does not have a family bathroom! LOL

[Toddrick33]

I'm pretty sure I pooed sometime during the day of the Ft. Wayne gig!

[CaraBear]

well at least your regular enough to call it!

[Labby]

Today I'll be heading to a three-day conference with two other youth leaders. Both women -- I'm the only guy from our church going. So why am I posting that in here?

How long do you think it'll take before I gross 'em out? :P

Too bad I didn't have any chili this morning...

[drake71449]

how long is a good poo? about long enough to smell??? ewwww tooo gross
:p

[Toddrick33]

Labby, I saw this bumper sticker today in the parking lot. I immediately thought of you and if I had seen it on a rack in a store, I would have bought it and mailed it to you. I love it!

Click here because the link name ruins it (http://www.zazzle.com/im_only_speeding_cause_i_really_have_to_poop_bumpe rsticker-128428809314081154).

(And we've all done it!)

[drake71449]

i like that Todd...i'm speeding cuz i have to poop....hopefully not in ur pants?!:(

:p

[Labby]

NICE!

Okay, so at this conference, there was a competition for the most embarrassing ministry moment. There were a lot of contenders for the winner:

One guy had a female worker accidentally see him naked.
One woman had her young daughter bring her silky undergarments to the nursery (which was partially staffed with middle-school boys).
One guy shot a drunk lady with an airsoft gun (me).

But the winner's story happened after a youth event. They'd gone to a restaurant afterwards, and he was in a good mood and only lived about a mile away, so he began to walk. As he walked, he felt the need to pass gas. So he did.

That's not the only thing he did.

He now had a dilemma, and did what we all do in a similar situation: clench, and walk slowly (but as quickly as we can).

In the middle of an intersection, it happened again.

So now he's standing in the middle of the crosswalk, trying not to unload, and everybody's honking at him to move. Which he finally manages to do.

And it happened again.

And now he's meeting pedestrians that he knows. Including those of the female gender. And matter is running down his leg and onto the ground.

So he finally gets home, and his mother asks him what was wrong and what that smell was.

"I dispensed into my pants three times."

So she made him stay outside, strip down in the front lawn, and hosed him off. Keep in mind that traffic is still driving by.

I've never heard so many people laughing so hard...

[Toddrick33]

Oh no!! That's really a true story? Oh, that's horrible... I hope he embellished a little bit!

In youth group days, I remember one of the guys likening the smell of poop to "spoiled cottage cheese in a jock strap."

Eww....

[drake71449]

LOL i have never laughed so hard in my life...

:P