selling vacuums totally sucks....but God still amazes me...

[Outcast]

Hey guys!
I am back with you...decided to keep my name to make it easier to know me. I have really missed you guys a lot because it has been a rough past month and I havent had too many aroudn to talk to. On April 21 I was fired from my job at Lason after 3 years...not my fault or due to any misconduct. The big bosses wanted to push me out the door...sad but true. Meanwhile, here I am wondering what to do. I saw an ad in the local paper for a job that promised to pay 1600/month no experience needed and I called the number and went to Carrollton to interivew and fill out an application. After much debate with friends trying to convince me i could find a job due to my limited mobility and wheelchair and many trying to persuade me to get on disability etc etc, I suddenly found myself working for a company where i would get paid for going into homes and demonstrating Kirby vacuum cleaners...yes, you read it right, demonstrating vacuum cleaners from a wheelchair. The managers and my co-workers were very open-minded you could say and they usually help by helping me get into the house and laoding and unloading the vacuum cleaner for me from the van we drive aroudn in as a group as we hit the neighborhoods. Strangely enough this has left almost every single Christian friend I know and church person I know freaked out and upset... I guess I havent learned to behave properly like a good crippled person ought to:)Unfortunately, the job has turned out for the past 2 1/2 weeks to be misleading and misrepresented. Soon after the trainign days were over we were told that we would not get paid for training, that if we wanted that 400$ a week and wanted to get paid on the upcoming Tuesday, that we had to go and do practice demos for our friends and family or whoever we would be comfortable around...and that we would be paid 10$ per demo...and that if we made a sale we would be given commission of some 500$ plus an additional bonus...anyway, i ran myself ragged as many friends did not want to cooperate or help out...burned up a lot of gas goign all over Newnan,Sharpsburg and Moreland...but i got my 6 required demos in thansk to a few faithful friends...honestly, people were shunning me like a leper. Anyway, to the surprise of all, on Monday, my first real day out in the neighborhoods in the van...i only did two demos...and I made my first sale in one home...so I was very happy and excited. On Tuesday, I go tmy first paycheck and almost cried when i saw it was for 60$ and here i was with rent due in two days or i would be locked out of my motel room:( When I went to my manager and told her i had thought it woudl be 400$ like the ad said and like i was told in the interview, but she informed me that I had misunderstood and that I would only get the 400$ when I was going out and working and doing actual demos for potential customers when the vans went out into the neighborhoods. Notice the deal is changing. Also, as i began meeting peopel I realized that everyone was new like me...that there were no employees who had been aroudn longer than 3-4 weeks at the most...no experienced salespeople...no vetrans who had been doing it for years, etc. Also, during the week, the owner walked out and quit, telling his wife who was one of the managers that she could have all the equipment and the space and try to run it if she wanted. Another bad sign. The final change in the deal was toward the end of my first week in the morning meetign when my manager explained how we got paid. If we do 15 or more a week we get paid 400$ base pay...anything less we get 0$. As for commission, we get 300$ for the first sale...and 100$ per additional sale...but only if we have 10 demos. And the way our pay system works in the end, we are given whichever is the highest of the two we qualify for...either the 400$ base pay or the commission...As it was a hard week and we got many no's and doors slammed in our faces, i managed to make it to exactly 10 demos and my manager who also does payroll said "i was good to go for getting my commission" But suddenly Tuesday morning while waiting for her to do payrool and hand out the checks i get called in her office and informed that there was a problem...that i cant get my commission until the next check or the one after...BUT as she knew I had rent to pay that the "company" would advance me 200$...leavign me about 30$ to get by for the week in gas and food. anyway, finally, after over a month of stressing and dealing with the labor department as my old job tried to lie and make it hard for me, I got my first check from the labor department. And I have made a hard decision to quit this pseudo-job. my manager has been nothing but kind and helpful to me and more than willing to adapt for the wheelchair and my co-workers on the van awesome in helping me get in and out of the houses etc. Also, my manager DID kind of do me a favor in a sense as she made a way for me not to go to the streets this week. But I cannot deny the decptive recruitment tactics of the company and its instability...lies are still lies. and with the labor dept money coming though i best let thsi help me through while i hunt for a real job. Still, i hurt and hesitate because somehow i have been psychologically duped into thinking i work and have a job even though i havent really been paid at all...:(:( So I am dreading a major cursing out and a lot fo pyschological manipulation tomorrow when i tel them the decision. But withthe economy being what it is, no guarantees i wil get in all my demos or make sales and no secure pay rate, i dont see any hope of makign real money.
Sad when unemployment looks better than working.
Yet, God has been doing wierd things my week and a half working in the neighborhoods. Almost every home I have been in has been an openly christian home and in between my efforts to demo there has been much fellowship and just gettign to know each other and even a chance to share my testimony with others. And well, finally on Wednesday, one young guy named James who dresses very very very formally for work with a shirt, tie dress pants etc for goign door to door and i began talking a little about church and all when i discovered eh strangely knew hoow to quote scriptures a me in our discussions. I was sad when he said he knew God had called him to be a preacher but he couldnt do that or be in church anymore or in any church as he was "backslidden" and living in sin as he had moved in later with his girlfriend/now fiancee a few years ago. i told him the livign condition was easy to handle...to either go ahead and marry or her try to live apart until they could. But it seemd more and more he seemed bothered about how backslidden he was and how far from God he was...that he would have to get right again with God first with his life and all. I simply asked him what was stoppign him from going back to God now...telling him that nothign he had done or nothign he thought he had done could ever catch God by surprise...that it was not too late to go back. He seemd quiet and thinking when i got off the van to get into my car and go home. Funny, in some strange way i made a better missionary than a vacuum salesman...

[LauraA]

Hey Jeff! I was thinking about you a few days ago. I prayed for you, in fact. I'm happy to see you here! I'm sorry about the vacuum sales job. I've heard other similar stories about these places. Sad.

I like how you kept looking up and witnessing during your ordeal. Jesus is Lord, that is for sure! And He is our provider, amen? Amen!

Praying that you stand strong and faithful tomorrow. Let us know how the talk with them goes, ok?

Laura

[Outcast]

Well, guys, I need major prayer right now. With all the confusing christian advice here aroudn me in newnan, georgia from friends and so forth...I made a hard and risky choice. I had christian friends and even two pastors telling me to go ahead and quit...and to not even bother mentioning the commission earnings or the 60$ pay check...even though the labor department online weekly benefit claim form asks a yes/no question as to whether or not i worked and earned wages...and asks me to enter the gross totals of the wages earned for the week i am declaring if i have worked. The justification being that times are hard for everyone and funds are low and there will be no help for me should i come into an emergency need or worse crisis. So I need to get all I can from that unemployment money. Also, I have been sharply rebuked and been told that I never should have taken that job to start with. Yet if I want to go to lakeland Florida for the Todd Bentley revivals ther ewill be no troubel finding me a sponsor to pay for my meals, lodging and passage to get there...so here is my frustration. I feel very alone now as far as brother/sister in the Lord encouragement is concerned. i took a real risk in expressing my frustration over bad christian advice too...in response I got a strange fanatical cry/scream of pain saying: NOOOOOOO! DO NOT SPEAK SUCH EVIL AGAINST THE BODY OF CHRIST...THEY ARE NOT BAD...JUST IN ERROR! And then the person ran away from me in agony and pain...no joke! The funny thing...by the word christian i meant that as an adjective as in "advice from christians"...not as a noun....

So today i went out on a limb and wnet to the labor department and let everything out...the whole story. To my surprise I learned that the employee helping me was a christian. And I learned that I DID indeed have to inform the labor Department that I was working and had to declare any wages earned during any week I was claiming. And that I was allowed up to 50$ without "penalty". My benefits are 219$/week and anythign more than 50 will be deducted from that. As for the week I made the sale and supposedly 300$ commission, i chose to wait before claiming that one...and I was informed that I had done the right thing..and that it would be best not to claim that week at all as I wouldnt receive anythign from it. she also very gently and lovingly pulled up the online form and made me take a "good look" at the questions and how "yes" or "no" was required for each answer...and gently reminded me about Matthew 5:37. She also wanred me that any attempts to cheat the labor department would eventually be found out wither it be next week or next year...and wanred me to be very careful in the future...as it is a crime not to report wages in Georgia when collecting benefits. So, the good news, I can keep collecting weekly benefits in my "underemployment". Now the bad news...I am trapped and bound to the Kirby selling job...so it is a good thing i didnt quit. If i had quit, I would have to file a whole new claim for unemployment and there would have been a waiting period to determine whether or not i could receive benefits. Even worse, the claim would be against my former employer which would become the distributor for Kirby that I work for and not against my ex-job now. And as I hadnt worked there enough time and I woudl have quit under my own volition, I would not receive any benefits. Furthermore, even though my hours involve my being at work at 9:30 in the morning (25 minutes away in carrollton) and my getting home after 10 or 11 at night, while receiving benefits I must and will be expected to be actively seeking employment other than this job i am in and to be available if called for an interview or hired during the daytime. Also, if and when the field office in my area calls me in for questioning over the job searches i have made or if there is any kind of job training or re-employment workshop, i must report to them or risk losing my benefits. So, while doing what is good and just in God's sight, I need prayer as I will be suffering under man's laws...thanks guys!:)

[LauraA]

Being honest is totally, 100% the right thing to do. You made the correct choice there. You've made it through hard times before, right? You will again. And you will be blessed because you honored God's ways.

[Outcast]

yeah, i know...i think that is what faith is in everyday language...you know God is going to come through but you dont know where, when or how so you anticipate...
maybe there is a way to manipulate my unemployment benefits given to me by pouring as much as i can into rent and other bills like car insurance etc...if i can manage to get a month or so ahead...there wont be any reason to fear the labor dept and i can quit this job...the big problem based on my research on the net lies in the fact that i am an independent contractor now and independent contractors cannot get unemployment benefits if they are fired ro they quit their jobs...but yet the department of labor gives them the right as an employee to file a wage claim against the employer...is there anyone who would have knowledge about how to help me protect myself in this situation. I mean, it is kind of cruel and unfair for the labor dept laws to lock me into a job where i can make 0$ a week and to give me know choice but to be dependent on unemployment benefits. i mean, even doing internet job searches with my hours being between 9:30AM and 10PM or later at night gettign home...gonna be very hard to be actively seeking and available to work as a condition for keeping my benefits. Uh, Jeremy...wherever you are...or anyone else out here readign this...would anyone like an indentured servant/slave? I cook well, do limited but excellent cleaning from ground and wheelchair levels, speak several languages:D

[Outcast]

Hey guys,
I guess this is turning into a kind of venting, praise and prayer request one stop for me:):)

BREAKTHROUGH: Today at church one of the managers who is regional district manager of a fast-food restaurant chain here in Georgia heard my prayer requests in church and told me after the service that he would contact the work laws attorney of the "company" here in Georgia who has some connections and relations with the Georgia DOL and hopefully he will be able to help by getting someone he has an excellent rapport with to actually take the time, talk to me and help me deal with the situation...so keep in in prayer...

[Outcast]

I woke up this morning as usual and rushed around to get showered and ready to leave for work by 8:30. Had quite a hard morning as i am getting used to a "newer wheelchair". The story: One employee at the Kirby place where I work brought it to me after talking to her husband, whose mother died 8 months ago. They thought maybe a back-up chair woudl be good for me to have in case somethign ever happened to mine. Unfortunately, I ended up needign it sooner than I think. i rolled the new chair over to my car to put it in my trunk and asked one co-worker on the van we go out on daily to help me by following me with my usual chair so i could use it to get back over to the van. But when I got the new one in the trunk I saw the district distributor of the company in my wheelchair playing with it and making it pop wheelies and with hsi feet up in the air he kept making it spin around. I called out to him not to do that because the frame of the wheelchair was old and rusted...due to my original wheelchair being accidently destroyed by a church youth member who slammed his knee into the seat after losing patience while trying to open it for me...ignroing my talking to him and tryign to tell him how to. Once again I see a trend here because Mike (the district distributor) looked at me and turned away and continued showing off and playing with the chair. After, leaning on my trunk tired after some 5 minutes and at least 10 times of askign for it, i caught another employee going by me and told them: go over to him and tell him exactly what i say: BRING MY CHAIR TO ME...RIGHT NOW! The other employee did so and with a somewhat "offended look" Mike rolled it over to me and just got up and walked away without sayign a word. It felt funny the rest of the day but i managed to make it work. Last nigth before bed, the frame snapped and the entire back of the chair fell off. So much for my autographs on the back of the chair from many Christian artists and witnessing scripture references they put on it..*sighs* So here i am now in a hospital wheelchair that is hard to maneuver and control because it is so heavy and bulky...and I need time to get used to it...somethign I dont have. And I am wonderign hwo I will make it through the work day and be able to go into homes and demo the vacuum as I would have two things to worry about maneuverign at the same time.
So, I managed to get out the door and load it into the trunk. I rush to get gas and go to a full service station to save me the trouble of getting out and unloading and reloading the wheelchair. Suddenly, while I am taking off for Carrollton, I realize I forgot to take my blood pressure emdication and turn around to go back to the motel and get it. I arrive and see that the tiime is 8:50 and i start stressing otu because no matter hwo early i get started I always get delayed. And i was frustrated about being late for the mornign meetings. And suddenly it hit me: late for what? a job that doesnt pay me for my hours at all like it prmised in the ad and in the interview process? a job where i bring home 0$/week yet have to pump 20$ gas in my car every other day to be able to make it to work and back? And i pickjed up the phone and informed them of the wheelchair incident and the probs i was having and told them i would either be late or not in at all as I was havign great difficulty controlling the new one...and made it quite clear i wasnt happy about the old one being damaged by employees who need to learn to respect other people's things. I dont care what the bosses think. I dont care what the labor department thinks. I have tomorrow off due to orders from the labor dept to report fro re-employment registration. I dont plan to go back to Maximum Discovery. So what if they find out i quit somehow and cut my benefits. I will go over the local field office employees heads and make a trip to the main office in atlanta and deal with the comissioner himself to get the matter resolved. It' s that easy. Got that advice from a friend who owns a construction business and had an employee that worked for him off and on, while scretly keeping it from the labor department and gettign money he wasnt entitled to. They permanently revoked his rights to draw unemployment ever again once they found out. Yet my good-hearted friend, once he saw the man was truly sorry and had learned his lesson about lying and cheating, agreed to drive him to atlanta (the employee didnt have a car) and ended up gettign an appointment with the man right under the comissioner and everythign was re-instated to this guy withthe warning: if i ever see your name come up again in the system for even the slightest little discrepency...the deal is off...got it? So, i figure if the labor department can work things out for someone who lied and stole...why are they giving me a guy in a wheelchair who went out and immediately took the first job he could within 3 days of beign fired and filing an unemployment claim such a rigid hassle ove rrules and threats to take away my benefits if i quit a job that isnt paying me (not as in not paying what i want to make...but REALLY not paying me) and costing me a lot of time and money to work? I think it is time I learned to use my voice when needed...and ther eis nothign wrong with the question stated loudly: Are you treatign me this way because I am in a wheelchair? Lord knows I have a big honking Buick of a wheelchair now...and maybe i better learn not to be afraid to use it to protect myself while i job hunt and put life back together...again:)

[LauraA]

First of all Jeff, that guy who messed with your wheelchair needs a talking to. How utterly disrespectful to treat you that way. That's not acceptable!

Don't feel bad for missing work. You have to have a workable, drivable, controllable wheelchair to get around. It's not like you are missing out on any pay, either.

I'll continue to keep you in prayer. The Lord has a plan, keep trusting Him.

Laura

[Outcast]

Well, guys, I got some very very bad news today. I was summoned to the Labor Department today and I learned that my unemployment benefits will be taken away from me effective immediately. Not that I have done anythign wrong...it is just the letter of the law. First of all, to receive unemployment benefits in Georgia you have to be unemployed and actively seeking and be available to work. And thoe 10-12 hour days riding around in a van disqualify me on both counts. All these hours count as full time work. Whether i get paid or not for these hours or whatever the company promised to pay and didnt...little can be done as there is no contract or signed anythign from them agreeing to this. The ad in the newspaper and whatever discussed during the interview becomes my word against theirs. Also, they say it is hard to know what i was made aware of and not made aware of during my time there...and as for the wasted hours and time riding aroudn in the van, that counts as duties of the job. Finally because fo these long hours, that technically makes me inelligible for unemployment benefits because the time spent on this job prevents me from searchign for a job and keeps me unavailable to receive calls for job interviews and work. So, i must officially quit this job with good reason which will be entirely up to me to prove and provide documentation for as it will be my word against this company...and i was gently wanred that it woudl be almost impossible for me to prove. Meanwhile, i could try and re-apply for unemployment benefits which would take a long time to process and decide. I had found a very kind and professional chrsitian lady and she honestly spent over 2 hours with me talking and even tried to find a way to keep me on benefits...she was the office supervisor...and even tried dealign with her bosses...she had tears as she came back and had to give me the news. And she did assure me that I would get the one last check for 219$ from last week and it would be documented that I was honest in reporting my work status and wages as i was supposed to...that everythign i got in the past woudl be counted in my favor as a goof on their parts...so the labor dept should not be able to come after me and try to get the past money back as "overpayments...meanwhile, pray hard...i trust in God but i am scared... Already i hear voices of judgement liek ebfore telling me " you should have just kept your mouth shut and kept working or quit and said nothing about the job at maximum discovery" when i would mention what woudl God say about lying i would get answers...like "yeah, bt sometimes you cant afford to be honest...you need money and a job" meanwhile i sense christian friends, churches i know and my church scattering...and with me dealing with all of this and needing to vent last week I had one even try to exorcize me...cast out an evil spirit...she said a negative spirit was making me feel and think these things and make all this negative stuff fall from my lips...and she told that is why their prayers for healing dont work and what keeps me crippled and limited mobility and in a wheelchair...that God in his holiness cant be around or annoint this...she is the president of the alliance of churches in my community and county...so, not liek i can challenge her on that word:(:( anyway, jobless, soon penniless, demon possessed and maybe homeless soon in two weeks...now what?:) Do i get my own pair of iron chains and cemetary to run around in and play in as I go mad?:)

[LauraA]

I guess if someone said to me that I "can't affort to be honest", I would ask them to give me some Scriptures for that principle. And if someone is in a hard place and talks about it, it does NOT mean you are demon possessed. Pres or not, that is just wrong. I would say she would do better to encourage you with God's Word rather than kick you when you're down.

Trust Jesus.

[Outcast]

Yeah, I am doing that gently and in love and it doesn't seem to be doing any good with people or this one friend in particular...he is kind of what you would call "country" and stubborn even though normally he is a faithful friend and has a good heart...it was hard to get confronted and yelled at Friday over my "present situation" as he definitely won't be able to help me in any way if i go to the streets. With things being said like: "You've run a stop light or done a hollywood/roll-thorugh stop at a stop sign before...you see,? that is lying and not being honest too and you are guilty of it already...so why the big deal about telling the labor department you were working...should of just kept quiet about it!" Also peopel seem to have this wierd idea that i can just go to the local DEFACS department and get me "some of that disability" in the next 10 days or at least get the ball rolling and then everythign will be OK. Somehow the fact that I am able and actually want to work and want to live a regular life don't seem to matter...my feelings that is.... My friend especially accuses me of pride but somehow in my heart I think that he just doesn't liek being proven wrong. He got upset over the Kirby job when i got it 3 days later after I was fired and he was telling me I couldnt find a job because I was in a wheelchair. Yeah, the job was bad and he claims he tried to warn me but all he was saying was that his friend madeleine had worked there for a year and she said that she never sold a single vacuum. When I asked him for more info on what hr experience was like all he would say is..."she didnt say...or I didnt bother to ask her" My friend is kind of silent and non-verbal...doesnt liek to talk very much. Yet i have judgement on me from the church because he tried to warn me and i wouldnt listen to him. Also they tell me stuff like they knew about the Kirby dealers and all the stories and that it was a bogus job...BUT I was so happy and excited about finding a new job that they didnt want to crush my spirit so they stayed mostly silent...only suggestign the job might not work out for me because I am in a wheelchair.

I have tried to talk to church elders and both the pastor and assistant pastor about my bad situation now telling them honestly that i have only one last check from the labor department and it will be enough to pay the rent for one week only...and that even if i find a job today it wont provide a paycheck in time....that i am risking homelessness. Honestly, no jokes...and this is real...not pretense on their parts, they get a wierd look in their eyes and a strange smile and don't understand....seeming slightly freaked out by my statement. Instead I am warned "what you confess with your mouth so shall you have...don't speak evil or negative things into existence or even think them...in the name of Jesus you are gonna get that 25$/hour job and have so much money you cant even imagine ...now be blessed brother...be blessed!" I know God still has me in His sight and in His hands...but am I showing a lack of faith by at least acknowledging the situation and its existence...?

So, I wonder...with life being what it is...do I want to take my last check and pay rent for one last week...or do I want to take it and hop on a bus and take my chances somewhere else and escape all this "weird theology" that seems to be an infection from my old church? :D

[Outcast]

Guys,
Thanks for lettign me vent here. After much prayer and thought it hit me...why am I putting up with this? I mean I got church peopleand christians tellign me I should have lied to the labor department, some telling me in so many words that i am not worth a job that i need to get disability: every job i try to get or talk about looking into is shot down with a "stop wastign your time...get on disability." And others it is all about judgement...i have to be doing some sin to have God coming against me so they turn a deaf ear. I can do better than this...time i started diminishing relationships here in good ol' Newnan, Georgia:)

[Kelly]

Don't let that get to you. I recently went on a job interview and the lady told me to my face "In order to do this job you need to be able to stand. You should go get a desk job somewhere. I'm sure you could do that." She said that to me even after reading my resume which CLEARLY shows that I have the ability to run a classroom without standing! But unfortunately, it's a daycare and it's written in their job description that you have to be able to stand, so legally, they can deny me employment (and still stand by the fact that they don't discriminate). It's terrible. But I know that it's just God's way of telling me He has bigger and better plans for me, and I know He has bigger and better plans for you! So don't give up!

[themadclipper]

Ditto the quitting part- you only lose when you quit. Paul admonishes all to run the good race.

[Outcast]

Hey,
About that daycare job...you seriously might want to have someone look into that. Yes, it is the trend nowadays in daycare and education, they expect you to "stand" but that is more because they want to get rid of the teachers from the days of old that sat behind the desk up and talked and gave lessons that were fashionable up until aroudn the 1980s but it's more for professionalism and image more than it is for actual job duties or necesitiy in order to perform the job tasks:)

About that one friend of mine in particular who other Christian and church folks i know seem to know and agree with, I may have just inadvertently offended him and taken initial steps to ending the friendship. He sends out a lot of forwarded jokes from hsi sisters and various friends of the family...this joke was just a disgusting racial slur mainly against African-Americans and also a little of a nationalistic slur against germans too. I warned him that as long as we are friends...that he should never ever send me that kind of trash again in my e-mail.

As for the church situation and the wierdness over my situation I have heard two things:

1. We are standign in the gap more than ever for your physical healing now so you will be able to walk and do things normally and go out and get any job you want without worrying about whether or not you can do it.

2. Stop speaking that negative stuff, you arent moving out of your room so you wont need our help with boxing up, moving, and storing stuff

Yet I notice no one seems to have a sense of understanding or urgency.

Meanwhile, I found two jobs last night at the Georgia Labor department online and applied for the referrals. Got another 25 minutes before they open up and I can call them to confirm they got my requests and see about getting/picking up the referrals. One is a very good job involving data entry and using a billing program. Pays 10-12$ an hour. The other is a cashier/clerk job in a local store of some kind that pays 6.90/hour...so be praying guys!:)

Also, I will go to the local YMCA gym (unfortunately not the kind that offers charitable housing and a bed) and see about gettign a sponsorship. Been wanting to get a membership there forever since they re-opened in late 2006 but could never afford it. Will apply for a sponsorship and of course, they give you a complimentary 2 week guest pass to enjoy the facility. The pool would be so good for building up my legs a little now. Also, woudl provide a place to shower and keep clean if i do have to temporarily go to the streets;)

[Outcast]

STATUS REPORT

Still no news from the two companies that had jobs listed with the labor department online. The labor department has to have the thumbs up from them before they can give me the name and contact info of the companies. So keep praying. I put in online applications and requested job referrals as much as I could today.

Went to prayer meeting at church today. Left more disturbed than comforted and at peace. One lady and the pastors wife had a message from God for me...that my physical healing is coming soon...so I need to be doing nothing but on my face seeking God's presence for the rest of this week. The revival meetings and newly designated "Newnan Outpouring" God will do from our church is supposed to bring this about so I need to be there every night. I am to allow no distractions...not even job hunting or worrying about contacting OneRoof which is a christian organization helping peopel with housing, food and rent when they can nor am I to worry about any other organizations that could help me.

I learned from the motel manager that someone from my church called inquiring about my rent. Wouldnt leave a name or number. I go to the revival and learn the one church elder who promised me his friend the labor law attorney would help with my labor department problems 2 weeks ago was the one calling and inquiring. He wanted to let me know that he called and checked and that my rent was good for 8 more days...until next week...so I dont need to worry. The wierd thing...I know this. I paid rent yesterday and told him about it last night including the that I only had 8 more days. in the motel before I woud be out on the street. He told me hopefully his friend the labor law attorney would be in touch with me to help me find someone at the labor department sometime next week so they could talk to me and help me with my questions over the benefits I am receiving. I told him last week via email that the labor department had taken away these benefits and I had no more rent or income after this week. He replied expressign his sorrow over the sitaution and let me know he was praying for the Lord to provide for me. But now I am confused that he seems to have forgotten and or doesnt understand anymore. And it is not only him...it is the whole church...it's liek they can't understand reality at all...no jokes guys...I am scared. This seems to be a charismatic trend here in Newnan...first my old church I left and now this one....*screams and looks for wall to bang head on* i guess maybe it will dawn on them when my clothes becoem ragged, dirty and stink to high heaven that something might be wrong in my life....*sighs*

I got a call from a very sweet Ms. Rowe from OneRoof (yes, I disobeyed and called her) . She is very willing to help but can guarantee nothing as it si the first of the month and they have already been hit with so many other requests and promised to help others. She will let me know tomorrow. Meanwhile, she was concerned about whether or not I had food to eat and when i told her that after rent and gasing up my car, only 5$ remained to me she promised to at least bring me some food from their food ministry as well. I did not give her extra details, but when she asked if I had a church and what did they say about my situation...i told her the truth as they said it: that they were helping me by standign in the gap and pressing in and beleiving in my healing so I would be able to get up and walk and get any job i wanted and not have to worry about money or rent or any lack again, etc etc...i got an almost uneasy frightened silence and an uncomfortable "wow, that's...uh...interesting but what about the situation at hand now?" maybe i will dare to talk to her about any church here that might be willing to offer me some help especially counseling...sometimes I wonder if maybe I am strange and different and not able to fit in the hcarismatic churches here in my city because there is somethign wrong with me...maybe my friend was right about demonic/spirit possession. she did say that sometimes as i was upset or talking my face would change or contort in anger...so maybe it is the "thing" manifesting in the physical realm.

Meanwhile, time to go and rest and enjoy my new music CD. I am on the Atlanta Fest mailing list and as a gift through Chic-Fil-A the group "down under" made their whole cd free and downloadable to mailign list members liek me. i wont be going to atlanta fest for 1 day thsi year like I had hoped but God sends a little of it to me today to comfort me. Maybe I will pop a little popcorn at get my own praise party going:) thansk for listenign guys.

[LauraA]

Matthew 25

34Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:

35For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

36Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

37Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

38When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

39Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

40And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.


By the way, Jeff, every one who is speaking when upset, mad or frustrated looks that way. It DOES NOT mean you are demon possessed. Don't listen to that.